When the Quiet of Night Becomes Too Much

Night is when it catches up with you. During the day there are people around, things to do, noise to fill the gaps. But when the house goes quiet and the lights are off, the loneliness you have been pushing aside all day sits right down on your chest. You feel it in your whole body. And there is nobody to tell you it will be okay.

You are not imagining it. The night really is harder. And you were not meant to sit in that darkness alone.

Hashkiveinu. It comes from Maariv (the evening prayer), and the Gemara in Berachos (4b) teaches that Chazal composed it because nighttime brings a special vulnerability. The word hashkiveinu means “lay us down,” and in it we ask Hashem to spread His shelter of peace over us, to protect us in the shadow of His wings, and to guard us until morning. If you are looking for a prayer for loneliness at night, this is the one our mesorah has given us.

Before You Say This Tefillah

We at Rabbi Meir Baal Haness Charities have composed this tefillah for the person who dreads the nighttime, when everyone else is asleep, and the loneliness becomes almost too heavy to carry. Before you say the traditional Hashkiveinu below, take a quiet moment and speak to Hashem in your own words, or use these:

Master of the Universe, lay us down in peace, for this night is long and I am alone. The silence kills, the darkness magnifies the fear, and no one is here to tell me it will be okay. Spread over me Your shelter of peace, protect me in the shadow of Your wings, and let me feel that I am not alone. God of Meir, answer me.

If giving tzedakah, add:

In the merit of the tzedakah I give in the merit of Rabbi Meir, may you illuminate my night. Ribbono Shel Olam, I care for Your children, please care for me.

Hashkiveinu

הַשְׁכִּיבֵנוּ יְהֹוָה אֱלֹהֵינוּ לְשָׁלוֹם וְהַעֲמִידֵנוּ מַלְכֵּנוּ לְחַיִּים וּפְרוֹשׂ עָלֵינוּ סֻכַּת שְׁלוֹמֶךָ וְתַקְּנֵנוּ בְּעֵצָה טוֹבָה מִלְּפָנֶיךָ וְהוֹשִׁיעֵנוּ לְמַעַן שְׁמֶךָ׃
וְהָגֵן בַּעֲדֵנוּ וְהָסֵר מֵעָלֵינוּ אוֹיֵב דֶּבֶר וְחֶרֶב וְרָעָב וְיָגוֹן וְהָסֵר שָׂטָן מִלְּפָנֵינוּ וּמֵאַחֲרֵינוּ׃
וְהָסֵר מֵעָלֵינוּ מַכָּה וְחֶרֶב וְרָעָב וְיָגוֹן. וְהָסֵר שָׂטָן מִלְּפָנֵינוּ וּמֵאַחֲרֵינוּ. וּבְצֵל כְּנָפֶיךָ תַּסְתִּירֵנוּ כִּי אֵל שׁוֹמְרֵנוּ וּמַצִּילֵנוּ אָתָּה כִּי אֵל מֶלֶךְ חַנּוּן וְרַחוּם אָתָּה׃
וּשְׁמוֹר צֵאתֵנוּ וּבוֹאֵנוּ לְחַיִּים וּלְשָׁלוֹם מֵעַתָּה וְעַד עוֹלָם׃

The Hashkiveinu is part of Maariv, the evening service, and Chazal placed it there because night brings a unique kind of vulnerability. The bracha asks Hashem to do something very specific: to lay us down, to cover us, to stay close while we sleep. It is said by every Yid, every night, as a community. But the words speak directly to someone lying alone in the dark, wondering if anyone is watching over them.

What These Words Mean for You

Hashkiveinu l’sholoim “Lay us down in peace.”

Hashkiveinu. Cause us to lie down.

This opening asks Hashem to grant peaceful rest. Night can leave a person feeling exposed and unsettled, and the brachah begins by turning that need directly into tefillah: Hashem, bring me to a place of peace and let me rest under Your care. Sukas shloimecho “The shelter of Your peace.”

A sukkah is a fragile shelter, open to the sky rather than sealed like a house.

The image of a sukkah can rightly suggest shelter under Hashem’s protection. Chazal famously discuss whether the sukkot in the wilderness were actual booths or the Clouds of Glory, which already ties sukkah-language to divine shelter. In this brachah, the request is that Hashem spread His peace and protection over us.

Uv’tzeil k’nofecho tastireinu “And shelter us in the shadow of Your wings.”

Tzeil. Shadow. Shade.

Shelter. Wings are the closest image the Torah gives us for how the Shechinah holds a person. A bird shelters its young not by building something around them, but by drawing them underneath. This language echoes Tehillim itself: “Hide me in the shadow of Your wings” (Psalms 17:8). In Tanach, the image of wings is a recurring image of refuge and protection. Here the brachah asks not only for safety, but for nearness to Hashem’s sheltering care.

Shomreinu umatzileinu “Our Protector and Rescuer.”

Two words, two different kinds of help. Shomreinu. Our guard. Ongoing, constant watch. Umatzileinu. Our rescuer.

his phrase asks for both kinds of help: ongoing guarding and rescue from danger. That is a faithful way to read these words. At night, when fear and loneliness can feel stronger, the tefillah places both needs before Hashem. This phrase tells Hashem: You are both of those things to me. A related tefillah that speaks to this same yearning is the prayer when overwhelmed.

How to Say This Prayer

The Hashkiveinu is part of Maariv, so if you daven the evening service, you already say it every night. But you can also say it on its own, right before bed, as a personal prayer for loneliness at night. There is no wrong time. If it is two in the morning and you cannot sleep and the loneliness has settled in, open a siddur or read the words here and say them quietly.

Sit or lie in bed. You do not need to stand. The whole point of this tefillah is that you are asking Hashem to be with you in the place where you rest. Before you begin, set your kavanah. You might say in your own words: “Hashem, the quiet of the night brings a heaviness I cannot shake on my own. I am asking You to wrap me in Your sheltering presence so I know I am not alone. Calm my heart, protect me through the darkness, and bring me to morning.”

Tefillah and tzedakah rise together. When you add an act of giving to your prayer, you are giving in the zechus of Rabbi Meir Baal Haness, connecting your tefillah to the merit of a tzaddik who knew what it meant to call out to Hashem from an impossible place. After saying the Hashkiveinu, you may add: Elokah d’Meir aneni! The prayer for anxiety attack speaks to this same yearning from another angle.

Give Tzedakah in the Zechus of Rabbi Meir Baal Haness

The Gemara (Avodah Zarah 18a-18b) tells how Bruria asked Rabbi Meir to rescue her sister, who had been condemned by the Romans to a house of shame. Rabbi Meir approached the guard with a bribe, teaching him to say “Eloka d’Meir aneni!” — “God of Meir, answer me!” — if he was ever in danger. When the guard asked for proof, Rabbi Meir threw a clod of earth at nearby man-eating dogs. They lunged to devour him, and he called out the words — the dogs turned away. The guard was convinced and released her, later using these powerful words to miraculously save his life. When we daven with these words, we are asking Hashem to answer our prayer in the merit of this great tzaddik and the miracles he merited.

When you lie awake at night, alone, that story speaks to you. Not because your situation is the same, but because the cry is the same. You are calling out from a dark place. Giving tzedakah in the zechus of Rabbi Meir  is asking Hashem to hear your tefillah in the combined merit of this great tzaddik and your own act of chesed.

Rabbi Meir Baal Haness Charities, founded in 1799, supports talmidei chachamim and the poor in Eretz Yisrael. When you give tzedakah for the poor of Eretz Yisrael in the zechus of Rabbi Meir Baal Haness, your kindness and your tefillah rise up together.

Give Tzedakah in the Zechus of Rabbi Meir Baal Haness

What is the best prayer for loneliness at night?

The Hashkiveinu is the tefillah Chazal composed specifically for the nighttime. It asks Hashem to lay us down in peace, to spread His shelter over us, and to guard us through the darkness. It speaks directly to the experience of feeling alone and unprotected at night, and it has been said by Klal Yisrael every evening for generations.

Can I say the Hashkiveinu when I feel alone and afraid at bedtime?

Hashkiveinu is part of Maariv. There is also precedent to say its text again before sleep as part of Keriat Shema al haMitah, as a tefillah for protection and peace through the night.

Who is Rabbi Meir Baal Haness and how does saying his name help with nighttime fear?

Rabbi Meir was a great Tanna who said “Elokah d’Meir aneni!” to the guard to rescue Bruria’s sister from captivity when there seemed to be no way out. Saying these words and giving tzedakah in his zechus is asking Hashem to answer your tefillah in the combined merit of Rabbi Meir and your own act of chesed. Rabbi Meir Baal Haness Charities supports talmidei chachamim and families in Eretz Yisrael. Those who daven this tefillah often find the prayer for despair meaningful as well.

When should I say this prayer for loneliness, only at night or anytime?

The Hashkiveinu is written for nighttime, but you can say it whenever the feeling of loneliness is strong. Hashem hears your tefillah at any hour. Many people find it especially meaningful right before bed, when the quiet settles in.

How does giving tzedakah connect to overcoming loneliness and finding comfort?

Tzedakah is an act of caring for someone else. When you give to another person while asking Hashem to comfort you, you are reaching outside of yourself at the very moment you feel most alone. That act of chesed joins with your tefillah and rises together before Hashem.

A Prayer for the Long Night

That took honesty. Bringing it before Hashem takes trust.

May Hashem spread His shelter of peace over you tonight. May the silence that felt so heavy become a quiet in which you feel His presence. May He guard your going out and your coming in, and may you wake to a morning that feels a little lighter than the night before. You are not alone. You were never alone.

You can submit a prayer request to the scholars at the kever of Rabbi Meir in Tiberias at no cost. They will daven for you by name through Rabbi Meir Baal Haness Charities. And if you would like to give tzedakah in Rabbi Meir’s zechus as well, your kindness will rise together with your prayer.

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